I
I think
I’ve slipped in the body
Of an alternate self
She finds pleasure in pastels
Beauty in phrases from books lost
I see her, in the sunshine, dancing
She is alive
And I possess her,
Afraid that she sees me too,
Afraid that she has me tethered
To life
II
What is left within me,
but Where anger once burned
Now, emptiness lives
III
My muse
Don't you see
You stir
Such emotions in me
That I can't quell
Or say
So I show them
In littlest ways
And devote
My loveliest poems
To you
IV
Oh, grieve my soul
your shadows pollute
to escape, I wait
my fall absolute
V
I yearn
To be nothing To be liberated
From a weight that binds
To what, I know not Tired of waking up to despair
This need to escape
Yet tethered with a flimsy rope
Do you see my distress?
I don’t care if the idea alone
Is devil itself
This ache to simply not exist
VI
Wait!
Don’t come in,
Not yet
A moment, please,
I need to dust the shelf
It carries a debt
From my past
There are shadows still
Harmless, really
Just a lamp there
And lo!
The dark slithers
Hmm, that’s better
Okay, come on in,
I’ve set the stage,
Are you ready to play your part?
VII
How many have you immortalised
In the poems, stories you write
Touched by your soul, oh so divine
Unknown to your muse (s)
You took their love, their life
And made it so fucking sublime
VIII
Let's pretend
To be chased
By the silence of paradise
Maybe then
We will dare to be divine
IX
When you touch my words
With your lips
Promise I will never change
Bury me alive
So I could never get better
But your kiss
Aches to have me forever
And a promise
Until then, I too shall remain
X
A curious non believer
Impatient, impertinent fool
Where do you look?
Who do you search for?
Forsaken,
You are in this maze,
Of a godless universe
Your creation…
Your curse